Last week’s installment of Tantri Wija’s weekly column in the food section of the New Mexican, “Bacon is the New Black,” was particularly clever, skewering the food-trendiness of recent decades “with chefs stacking tiny little squares of shaved daikon radish and beef carpaccio atop one another in artistic towers that look like hats from Fellini movies.” A food trend Wija likes (and so do I) is the return of bacon from its exile during the health-crazed late seventies. I love bacon, and eat it happily with eggs and pancakes, in salads and sandwiches, in potato gratins and whatever else it seems to go with. But not with chocolate.
Yes, I said chocolate. According to our local food critic, our local Whole Foods Market sells a concoction called “Mo’s bacon bar” which contains applewood-smoked bacon. Being a food writer and obviously a good sport, Ms. Wija bought the thing and tried it.
It was amazing. It made me kind of nauseous, but it was amazing. The bacon fat married in a deeply disturbing way with the chocolate to create the culinary equivalent of sex with your boyfriend’s best friend.
I was half hoping she was pulling our leg about the whole thing, so just to make sure I googled “chocolate+bacon” and sure enough, confirmation was forthcoming. Not only can you buy chocolate bars with bacon in them, but there’s even a store that sells whole slices of bacon dipped in chocolate.
Now, I’ve always been a fairly adventurous eater. I’ve tried snails, frogs’ legs, kangaroo (yes, really — and in Paris, even). I’ll try just about anything once that doesn’t contain insects. But I have no plans to head off to Whole Foods and pay $8 for a candy bar with pork in it. As I might have said four decades ago, “I would not, could not, Sam-I-am.” As I would have said three decades ago, “Eeew, gross!” Now I’ll just borrow a phrase from my favorite TV cook, the science-geek culinary genius Alton Brown, and say, “Definitely not good eats.”